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Dependency problems
Started by McLovinSam at 2008/08/22 04:51PMLatest post: 2008/08/23 06:16PM, Views: 794, Replies: 105
#11
2008/08/22 05:35PM
Re: Dependency problems
NoSoup4you |
Great topic McLoving! How are things going, BTW? |
#12
2008/08/22 05:35PM
Re: Dependency problems
dimples2010 |
Quote cardinalgirl: Quote Kelly07: I think the same way too, Lulu thinks her only solution is Johnny but it is not, and on the other hand Lucky doesn't know the truth about who killed Logan and he is being only prodective of his little sister so i don't blame him for not taking her to see johnny I don't think that would matter....he hates Johnny and nothing (it seems) will change that. I honestly think it has something to do with some held over issues he has because of Elizabeths feelings for Jason. IMO...Lucky has Control issues. As I have said in the past; the Spencers are all whacked. 
|
#13
2008/08/22 05:37PM
Re: Dependency problems
McLovinSam |
Quote dimples2010: Quote Canadiana: Quote zaria: Quote Canadiana: Quote McLovinSam: OK...is it just me or does anyone elde think Lulu's dependency on Johnny is EXTREMELY unhealthy? I understand she is in love but her depending on johnny is out of control. Dependency can range from having dependent behaviors to having an extreme need to be taken care of by another person. This need can become so strong that it results in submissive and clinging behavior. The dependent person may fear being alone or separated. And IMO Lulu needs to get better without Johnny holding her hand. I know alot of people thought Lucky should have taken her to see Johnny but I would have done the same thing in his shoes. I wholeheartedly agree. I don't really like the way Lucky handle her (because I tend to think he's a bit of a bully) but honestly, Lulu saw Johnny not 24 hours earlier and if he's the only one that can save her sanity she's in for a whole heap of trouble. Ditto everything Canadiana just said! And IA with McLovin, Lucky was right not to take her to Johnny. I was kind of mad at Jason for letting Lulu talk him into doing that for her, it really was not his place. Well Lulu pulled the Elizabeth/Jake card and Jason's very sensitive when it comes to that subject. Really don't like that she did that, though. She knows that's his weakness and she played it big time. OHHHH that made me so mad! And I am not even a Liason fan! It just reminded me of when carly was going through everything with Michael and she showed up at the hosiptal and her house to get carly to protect Johnny. |
#14
2008/08/22 05:40PM
Re: Dependency problems
JOHNNYLOVER |
I think that Jason is her step-cousin by law. So he is family, I don't know why she said he was her brother when she could have said cousin. I do NOT think that she is to dependent on Johnny. She doesn't know who to trust right now and it says something that she trust Johnny and feels safe with him. If you tear them a part then she isn't going to listen to anyone. At least now with Johnny she hears him telling her to listen to the doctors and that she is not going to go crazy like her mother. Which is all Lucky keeps telling her. Lucky IMO just wants to be in control. His way is always the right way. I truly think that Nick/Johnny have her best intrest at heart and are the only ones that support her and understand her enough to listen and not Judge her no matter what. Lucky is very Judgemental. Johnny is what she needs to feel safe. He is very claming (sp) to her. I think that if Johnny is who she feels she needs then let her have him. If Lucky can't handle that, then Lucky should butt out. He's not helping her, he's hurting her. IMO Lucky is part not all, but part of the reason that Lulu is in the state that she is. It doesn't help her to hear that he thinks she is going to go Crazy like there mom ALL THE TIME. I think that if she has to choose a brother to trust while Johnny is in jail then I would go with Nick and totally block everything that Lucky says out. |
#15
2008/08/22 05:44PM
Re: Dependency problems
pegrckr |
Quote meowbowow: Quote McLovinSam: OK...is it just me or does anyone elde think Lulu's dependency on Johnny is EXTREMELY unhealthy? I understand she is in love but her depending on johnny is out of control. Dependency can range from having dependent behaviors to having an extreme need to be taken care of by another person. This need can become so strong that it results in submissive and clinging behavior. The dependent person may fear being alone or separated. And IMO Lulu needs to get better without Johnny holding her hand. I know alot of people thought Lucky should have taken her to see Johnny but I would have done the same thing in his shoes. OMG I thot this same thing yesterday already!! I don't think Jason should have taken her to see him. All week she whined about seeing Johnny but look what happened when she did, she saw Logan again. ITA that LuLu needs to get better w/o Johnny holding her hand. I agree with you on this one! If she only sees Logan when she's with Johnny, then she doesn't need to be seeing Johnny. All she complains about is her putting him in jail. She will never get better until everyone knows the truth about what happened. |
#16
2008/08/22 05:45PM
Re: Dependency problems
|
McLovinSam |
Quote NoSoup4you: Great topic McLoving! How are things going, BTW? IMO Lulu is way too young to be in this dependent of another, not to mention someone she has only be involved with for less then 10 months. I miss the Lulu from last summer, this Lulu cannot do anything with Johnny..... or Johnny's name being mentioned...... I understand that she is sick and the need to cling to him makes sense. He is her rock right now....... BUT, prior to going crazy, Lulu was always Johnny this and Johnny that....... I want the Miss Independent, strong, Lulu back.... and until her and Johnny are over, I am not sure we will get that back. Hey Soup! Things are better...for the most part. Just taking one day at a time. This topic hits a little close to home because I have a family memeber going through some mental health issues. We had him committed and we to get a conservator in place for him and he is slowly getting better. But at first we were all enabling him...we thought if we watched him, if someone was with him, if his wife stayed isntead of divorcing him then he would be ok...but he wasnt. He needs to get better for himself. After he was committed, which only last 72 hours in my state, we had an interventiopn of sorts and explained we would no longer be around him if he didnt get help. Lulu needs to do this for herself and no one else...She needs to have faith that she can do this cause if she already thinks she is going crazy she will. |
#17
2008/08/22 05:46PM
Re: Dependency problems
|
pegrckr |
Quote cardinalgirl: Quote Kelly07: I think the same way too, Lulu thinks her only solution is Johnny but it is not, and on the other hand Lucky doesn't know the truth about who killed Logan and he is being only prodective of his little sister so i don't blame him for not taking her to see johnny I don't think that would matter....he hates Johnny and nothing (it seems) will change that. I honestly think it has something to do with some held over issues he has because of Elizabeths feelings for Jason. IMO...Lucky has Control issues. He most certainly does and should not be allowed in to see Johnny since all he wants to do is attack him. |
#18
2008/08/22 05:47PM
Re: Dependency problems
|
pegrckr |
Quote dimples2010: Quote meowbowow: Quote Canadiana I wholeheartedly agree. I don't really like the way Lucky handle her (because I tend to think he's a bit of a bully) but honestly, Lulu saw Johnny not 24 hours earlier and if he's the only one that can save her sanity she's in for a whole heap of trouble. IMO nobody can save anybody else, they have to save themselves. Sometimes we need help. I agree, but I don't think Johnny is the answer especially if she keeps seeing Logan when she's with Johnny. |
#19
2008/08/22 05:49PM
Re: Dependency problems
cardinalgirl |
Quote Canadiana: Quote cardinalgirl: Hi Canadiana! Hi Zaria! Two of my favorite Canadian friends! I'm sure you know what's coming, but that's what threads are for...right? I understand what you guys are saying, but I disagree (shocker, shocker...I know). I think that Johnny and Lulu are both in the middle of a bad situation right now, and that (true enough) things have not been handled correctly up to this point. There have been numerous bad decisions across the board during this whole situation...but they cannot be undone. Is she leaning on him more than she should be? Some will say yes, others will say no...but either way....forcing them to stay apart is not the answer either (IMHO), not to mention the fact that he doesn't have the right to make that decision just because he wants to. IMO, Lucky is being a bully and self appointed guardian to someone that is NOT underage, is not under his house rules, and is probably the LAST person (aside from maybe Tracy) who has a right to take the holier than thou attitude he has. Lucky does the same thing with everyone in his life. He seems to think he is always right and can enforce rules for everyone that he wants to. Well, with his track record...he is the last person I would listen to. Finally....I personally think that Lucky is PARTIALLY responsible for Lulu being the mess she is anyway...constantly telling her he thinks shes going to end up like their mom. You tell someone long enough that they are Ugly...they start to believe it. You keeps saying someone is stupid, they feel stupid. Same applies here. IMO, of course. Anyway...good to see you guys! TTYL..... Hey cardinalgirl, well I can agree with you about the Lucky situation. As I said in my post, I think he's a bully and really doesn't know how to handle situations except to force his opinion down the person's throat. However, I think everyone including Lulu herself has said that she could become her mother. So they all seem to be driving home this point. It's crazy, IMO: my mother is insane therefore I must be too. It certainly isn't very convincing. Oh, I wanted to add two more things, yes Lulu isn't underage but she is kinda acting like it and two, Lucky and Nik are Lulu's temporary guardians while she's at Shadybrooke. They did mention that she can't leave without their permission. Well, for the moment the only one "making" decisions for her (since his choices are always so great) is Lucky. Everyone else is ASKING Lulu...consulting her at least...even the Q's. Yes, a lot of people have been telling her she could end up like her mom..which in my opinion is ridiculous. What makes me particularly point to Lucky (other than the fact that ALL of his decisions seem to speak JUGHEAD IMO) is that HE is the one that went so far as to go to Johnny's garden shed and stand there asking Johnny if Lulu bothered telling him their mother was crazy? AND that he thinks she is going to end up in a chair next their mother. Why is he exempt in his opinion but Lulu is not? Did he tell everyone that he let a young girl buy illegal drugs for him...or did he make sure to tell every girl he ever got involved with about his mom's condition and that since it is hereditary it could happen to him? Anyway... I guess at least we both agree that Lucky is a lughead! LOL! |
#20
2008/08/22 05:51PM
Re: Dependency problems
joe2811 |
Quote JOHNNYLOVER: I think that Jason is her step-cousin by law. So he is family, I don't know why she said he was her brother when she could have said cousin. I do NOT think that she is to dependent on Johnny. She doesn't know who to trust right now and it says something that she trust Johnny and feels safe with him. If you tear them a part then she isn't going to listen to anyone. At least now with Johnny she hears him telling her to listen to the doctors and that she is not going to go crazy like her mother. Which is all Lucky keeps telling her. Lucky IMO just wants to be in control. His way is always the right way. I truly think that Nick/Johnny have her best intrest at heart and are the only ones that support her and understand her enough to listen and not Judge her no matter what. Lucky is very Judgemental. Johnny is what she needs to feel safe. He is very claming (sp) to her. I think that if Johnny is who she feels she needs then let her have him. If Lucky can't handle that, then Lucky should butt out. He's not helping her, he's hurting her. IMO Lucky is part not all, but part of the reason that Lulu is in the state that she is. It doesn't help her to hear that he thinks she is going to go Crazy like there mom ALL THE TIME. I think that if she has to choose a brother to trust while Johnny is in jail then I would go with Nick and totally block everything that Lucky says out. IMO- It is sad that Jason knows Lulu better then Lucky. wait, how is Jason her step-cousin? I think someone here said they didn't like Lulu "pulling the Jake card" actually, I liked that she did that. Jason seemed sensitive to her and was willing to discuss it with Lulu. I loved all of Jason & Lulu's scenes today. But to keep on topic here I do think that Lulu is too dependent on Johnny, but it is good set up for her pending insanity. It seems to fit right now. We shall see how it progresses. |
#21
2008/08/22 05:52PM
Re: Dependency problems
BNH444 |
Ha. Silly me, here I was thinking that people are supposed to be dependent on the people they love for support when they have a mental breakdown. Boy, I guess I had that wrong. |
#22
2008/08/22 05:55PM
Re: Dependency problems
Jmm1 |
Quote JOHNNYLOVER: I think that Jason is her step-cousin by law. So he is family, I don't know why she said he was her brother when she could have said cousin. I do NOT think that she is to dependent on Johnny. She doesn't know who to trust right now and it says something that she trust Johnny and feels safe with him. If you tear them a part then she isn't going to listen to anyone. At least now with Johnny she hears him telling her to listen to the doctors and that she is not going to go crazy like her mother. Which is all Lucky keeps telling her. Lucky IMO just wants to be in control. His way is always the right way. I truly think that Nick/Johnny have her best intrest at heart and are the only ones that support her and understand her enough to listen and not Judge her no matter what. Lucky is very Judgemental. Johnny is what she needs to feel safe. He is very claming (sp) to her. I think that if Johnny is who she feels she needs then let her have him. If Lucky can't handle that, then Lucky should butt out. He's not helping her, he's hurting her. IMO Lucky is part not all, but part of the reason that Lulu is in the state that she is. It doesn't help her to hear that he thinks she is going to go Crazy like there mom ALL THE TIME. I think that if she has to choose a brother to trust while Johnny is in jail then I would go with Nick and totally block everything that Lucky says out. IMO- It is sad that Jason knows Lulu better then Lucky. Johnnylover I agree with most of what you said....Lucky is partially to blame for the situation she is in...he has told her how many times that she is going to turn out just like their mother...to me that is cruel...the first time he told her that...a while back..I was so angry...I believe it was before this Logan s/l...when you tell someone something enough they will start to believe it... I do not think she is dependent on Johnny..if people were trying to keep me from my boyfriend...who I love completely...I would only want to see him...when people try to keep people apart it makes them want them more...that is human nature.... I do not think Lulu should have pulled the Liz & Jake card on Jason...but she knew that he would do what he wanted...but I do believe Jason wanted to help her before she said that...but was torn...In fact I also think that Jason knows Lulu better than Lucky, her own brother and that is sad because he does not spend that much time with Lulu... I think Lulu should stop seeing Lucky....as an adult in a mental hospital she has that right...he is not doing her any good...he may think he is but he is not. Lucky believes he is always right and knows what is best for everyone when he could not be more wrong, most of the time... I believe the best family member in all this is Nik...he may not like Johnny but he also respects his sisters decision and accepts that it is ultimately hers to make... |
#23
2008/08/22 05:56PM
Re: Dependency problems
|
pegrckr |
But then why does she still see Logan only when she's with Johnny. If he's her safe place she shouldn't be seeing Logan then...jmo. |
Modified 1 times(s), last time at:
2008/08/22 05:56PM
#24
2008/08/22 05:56PM
Re: Dependency problems
|
Jmm1 |
Quote pegrckr: Quote meowbowow: Quote McLovinSam: OK...is it just me or does anyone elde think Lulu's dependency on Johnny is EXTREMELY unhealthy? I understand she is in love but her depending on johnny is out of control. Dependency can range from having dependent behaviors to having an extreme need to be taken care of by another person. This need can become so strong that it results in submissive and clinging behavior. The dependent person may fear being alone or separated. And IMO Lulu needs to get better without Johnny holding her hand. I know alot of people thought Lucky should have taken her to see Johnny but I would have done the same thing in his shoes. OMG I thot this same thing yesterday already!! I don't think Jason should have taken her to see him. All week she whined about seeing Johnny but look what happened when she did, she saw Logan again. ITA that LuLu needs to get better w/o Johnny holding her hand. I agree with you on this one! If she only sees Logan when she's with Johnny, then she doesn't need to be seeing Johnny. All she complains about is her putting him in jail. She will never get better until everyone knows the truth about what happened. She also saw Logan at Shadybrook...remember Nik was walking towards her room and she was screaming...so it is not only when she is with Johnny |
#25
2008/08/22 05:57PM
Re: Dependency problems
meowbowow |
Quote dimples2010 Sometimes we need help. What I meant was that she thot that Johnny could save her when she can't. She needs to let the dr's help her, only them and God can save her. She's way too dependent on Johnny IMO. |
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